tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-89687515927035710622024-03-06T00:10:50.724-08:00Freakin' HappyI am. Except when I'm not.Freakin Happyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09294867207572600397noreply@blogger.comBlogger60125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8968751592703571062.post-71278121742108523422011-06-10T18:30:00.000-07:002011-06-10T18:48:49.629-07:00Surrender DorothyWay before tornadoes started ripping throughout the U.S. lately, I have always been a tornado dreamer. Tornadoes have been showing up in my dreams since I was a kid; maybe as a reaction to that, I've always been fascinated by them.<br /><br />Until the tornadoes in my dreams started sucking me up into the funnel and then throwing me out -- and I wake up right as I'm about to hit the ground. And then tornadoes started touching down in my state and county. Dreamz just got realz.<br /><br />I Googled "dream meanings tornadoes" and was expecting the usual -- they mean turmoil, or change, or I've just been watching too much Weather Channel. One interpretation I thought was interesting was: Tornadoes are air, and air in dreams supposedly represents the thought process. The spinning motion can mean your thoughts are spinning and you don't know which way to go. Or so the hippie website said.<br /><br />That hippie moon-catcher dream lady sounds right. I've been going through a lot emotionally lately and actually have been considering a few changes with much related stress -- to the point where I considered going back on Celexa, but didn't. Because I didn't want to gain weight again. I'm a paragon of health.<br /><br />My mom has always had tornado dreams too -- maybe it's hereditary, or maybe we're both just drama queens (Everyone we know: "Drama queens.") I either need to get my emotions/thoughts under control or really pay attention to those storm warnings from the Creepy Hobbit Weather Guy on my local station.<br /><br />Right now, the only vortex I see is the swirling vortex of procrastination. Back to work.Freakin Happyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09294867207572600397noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8968751592703571062.post-57303259368809826242011-05-13T09:43:00.000-07:002011-05-13T12:22:29.864-07:00In Which I Depress Myself or Squick Myself Out on PurposeFor some reason, I am attracted to articles/stories/news that are either crushingly sad/depressing or so horrifying/gross that I've been scarred after reading or seeing them. I'm a very visual person, so just reading something that is graphically described will just play on an endless loop in my head.<br /><br />I guess I wouldn't say I'm attracted -- more like plain stupid. Repeatedly.<br /><br />I can talk about this now (because I am no longer scarred--OK, fine, I'm no longer having nightmares about it) but my most recent example of this stupidity involves an article on <a href="http://www.theawl.com/">The Awl</a> a month or so ago about cannibal fetishists, or basically people who want to be eaten and find that exciting even though the end result is being dead. I know. I am an asshole for even clicking on the link to read it. But since The Awl tends to be snarky fun and I had the idea that it was just about communities of people who talked on discussion boards about it (and that was also covered in the article), I started reading. And then the article started talking about a dude WHO WAS ACTUALLY EATEN, and that there were VIDEO RECORDINGS of how it happened that they would then GO THROUGH IN GRAPHIC DETAIL.<br /><br />YES I HAVE TO USE ALL CAPS DID YOU JUST READ WHAT I WROTE?<br /><br />So guess who didn't stop reading? Yeah. I can't even link to the article because I don't want to subject someone else to it.<br /><br />It was like I was driving and couldn't stop in time to keep from running over a squirrel. I just could not stop reading. And then picturing it. And then freaking out to the point where I actually broke out in a cold sweat. Who does that to themselves?<br /><br />I was traumatized. I tried talking to my husband about it later that night because nothing makes you feel better about something awful than forcing other people to experience it. I still had crazy dreams about it that night and for a few nights after, and then for weeks I'd be driving or running or whatever and into my head would pop SOME DUDE TRIED TO EAT HIS OWN JUNK. Why God why??<br /><br />So I share this story of my epic dumbassery as a public service: Don't be me. That's good advice on many levels, but particularly in this case. I can't even get into why I always end up reading stories about spouses and children dying, end up tears, and then internally yell at myself for putting those vibes into the universe. I think the cannibal article is my swan song of Fucked Up Shit I End Up Reading.<br /><br />It's puppy dogs and ice cream from here on out.Freakin Happyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09294867207572600397noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8968751592703571062.post-6393442393306958072011-05-05T06:40:00.000-07:002011-05-05T06:55:15.980-07:00VictoryIt's been about a week since I found out I got an A in Statistics. I know, right? Me? Who barely got through basic Algebra II that was a requirement to graduate high school, even though I was taking Physics, AP English and had taken every science class offered by Stafford County? Well, except AP Biology because I refused to skin a cat -- plus it conflicted with AP English which I knew I would do well in. Anyway. Back to me usually sucking at math.<br /><br />I was a typical overachieving student who did well in everything except math; even the sciences that require math, like Chemistry and Physics, were fine for me because for some reason when applied to science, math made sense. Otherwise, nah. It took me forever to learn how to tell time on a clock. In 7th grade I had all As on my report card except math. I managed to squeak out a C after pulling a D+ during one of the grading periods. The shame, the shame. And that shame has pretty much followed me throughout my learning life -- anytime math is involved, I freeze. No one was more relieved to take the first calculator-enabled SATs than I.<br /><br />Statistics was on its way to becoming the same albatross as other math classes; the prof wasn't that engaged, when I read stuff it kind of went over my head, using the Excel tools to pull the data was fine, but interpreting them afterward was like wha? I was starting to sweat this whole shebang. Then I had to prepare for my midterm. So I decided I was going to start over and be good at this, dammit. I read the chapters out loud to myself like I was in first grade. I did all the practice problems. I reinterpreted examples to apply them to my life instead of the sample in the textbooks. I worked <span style="font-weight: bold;">hard </span>-- which for a Type-A classic Good Girl student with a photographic memory, was challenging. I'm not used to having to study to know something. ;)<br /><br />I got an A. By myself! Oh, it was on.<br /><br />And then I got a B on the second exam and promptly spiraled into panic mode. Maybe the A the first time was a fluke. I'm going to fail the final OMG.<br /><br />Never mind that the B was actually a B+ and I still had an A overall; suddenly I was in 11th grade again and felt like I had no idea what I was doing.<br /><br />Then I took the final and to no one's surprise, the checked-out professor has simply rehashed questions from the other tests and quizzes and with my photo-memory, I was golden. There were a few original problems that popped up, but I got through them. I got an A on the final and an A in class.<br /><br />So does it feel like a hollow victory that the final was a rehash and it was my memory that pretty much got me the A?<br /><br />Hell no. Now that I'm an adult, one of the biggest lessons I've learned is: You take the victories when you can.Freakin Happyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09294867207572600397noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8968751592703571062.post-42618504165625006952011-04-18T18:29:00.000-07:002011-04-18T18:40:36.931-07:00So, Hi. How Are You?Hey there, you ... people who are not reading this anymore because I disappeared for almost a year!<br /><br />A lot has happened since June 2010. A lot. For instance:<br /><br />My son turned 3 and will turn 4 this July. He is graduating from preschool in June and will go to pre-K in the fall. Holy nuts.<br /><br />I got into business school shortly after my last entry. I'm about to finish my second semester and will hopefully graduate next May. BTW, I hate Statistics.<br /><br />I went on anti-anxiety medication that made me gain a bunch of weight and I looked like a fat cow at my sister-in-law's wedding.<br /><br />My sister-in-law was a lovely bride and is now married.<br /><br />I went off the meds in October and I started running again and things are falling back into place.<br /><br />Well, they would be falling back into place if I didn't have to have foot surgery in July and take 3 months off from running. I'm enjoying it now while I can.<br /><br />I'm still at my job. November will mark 5 years with my company. That is the longest I have stayed anywhere, ever. I moved offices for the 9th time.<br /><br />I'm still not sure what the future holds for me there, but I'm taking it one day at a time and just seeing what happens.<br /><br />I started a tradition of going to VA Beach for summer vacation. This will be the second summer that we go.<br /><br />I bought a leather couch.<br /><br />I paid off all of my credit cards.<br /><br />My husband painted our office.<br /><br />OK, now I'm just reaching.<br /><br />Anyway ... a lot has happened. I felt like sharing it. I might share more -- writing things down is cheaper and less fattening than Celexa.Freakin Happyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09294867207572600397noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8968751592703571062.post-55048346286075930832010-06-15T09:19:00.001-07:002010-06-15T09:30:25.892-07:00The Waiting GameWhy hello, all two of my readers! I know, I've been gone for a bit. So what's up with me lately?<br /><br />I've been applying for business school! Yes, before taking the GMAT because I was smart enough to schedule my test *after* most application deadlines! I am smart, S-M-R-T. So I have also applied for a GMAT waiver. Everything has been mailed off, so I should hear from the school ... sometime, I guess. The official deadline is August 2.<br /><br />I've been taking pre-requisite modules in case I get into the school. Yes, you have to take these before you find out if you're accepted, so that you have enough time to complete everything before the MBA program begins. Since I majored in English as an undergrad, I have to take ... all 6 of the pre-reqs. Which in time spent going "wha?" and furiously taking tons of notes adds up to eleventy bajillion hours of modules. I've gotten into a routine and stuff is actually making sense now. How do I know? I tried explaining to Tom how to figure out predetermined overhead in order to calculate proper cost per unit using normal costing and he looked at me like I had three heads. I mean maybe I did have three heads at the time, but I think he was just awed by my awesome grasp of managerial accounting.<br /><br />Diet and exercise are going alright. Still working out with Jillian via 30DS although I've been itching to get back on my treadmill lately, so I may alternate. I hit a wicked plateau after dropping a quick 6 pounds after signing on with Lose It on my iPhone. Luckily patience (and not diving into a Costco-sized bag of Swedish Fish) kept me on track and as of this week I am losing again. Woo!<br /><br />I've got about 2 weeks before fulfilling my promise to post a pic of myself in my bridesmaid dress, so my weight picked a good time to start dropping again.<br /><br />The container garden is going well. Still waiting on tomatoes and green peppers to get going, though.<br /><br />It's way easier to wait for the veggies than the answer from school.Freakin Happyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09294867207572600397noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8968751592703571062.post-53205347345532241172010-05-18T06:31:00.000-07:002010-05-18T06:41:58.149-07:00Traveling and Plans and Projects, Oh My!Yes, it's been a few weeks!<br /><br />I've spent the last three weeks traveling to Nashville (before the floods), North Carolina, and Ohio. Then I promptly got sick last week and am continuing to battle allergies this week. It's been an awesome few weeks.<br /><br />Despite the travel and sickness and general malaise, there has been progress on several plans/projects. I have managed to not kill anything in my container garden -- in fact, stuff is growing! I've narrowed down my business school options and am now trying to figure out how to afford any of them. I'm still working out, doing the 30 Day Shred again. So sore am I. I've also started tracking my weight with the LoseIt! program - more to make sure my portions and calories don't start creeping up (like they did when I was traveling. Well actually, the calories didn't so much creep as make leaps and bounds; hello, lemon martinis and grapefruit gimlets and wine and copious amounts of delicious restaurant food).<br /><br />The family is good. B is still potty training and I am continually amazed at the power of M&Ms as a motivating factor. His birthday will be here before I know it and then I'll sit and wonder how the hell I have a three year and have managed to not break him yet. Tom has some cool things going on and his school year is almost over; then it will officially be summer.<br /><br />Finally, my bridesmaid dress arrived about a week and a half ago. I'm feeling so poofy that I have yet to admit that it's here or take a picture of myself in it. I'm giving myself a month to get my act together and then I am posting a picture no matter what. It will serve as good motivation, or public humiliation, or most likely, both!Freakin Happyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09294867207572600397noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8968751592703571062.post-89738212438990557262010-04-26T09:21:00.000-07:002010-04-26T09:42:44.697-07:00In Which The South Beach Diet Fails Me Again.When I'm chatting with friends, two of my go-to phrases involve the "definition of insanity" (doing the same thing repeatedly and expecting a different result) and <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sisyphus">Sisyphean </a>efforts. Probably because half the things I do in life tend to fall into these categories. Dieting has always been one of my Sisyphean standouts. Which brings me to the South Beach Diet, which I always think is going to work (and sometimes it does) but usually is just a big pile of fail.<br /><br />I first tried the diet at its peak in 2003, a few months before my wedding. Actually, Tom and I both tried it. And we were cranky bastards the entire two weeks where you cut out sugar and fruit and delicious carbs. It's a wonder we still got married. Weeks three and onward were fine. Although honestly, I should have known that anything that tells you that cocoa powder, Splenda, and RICOTTA CHEESE make a delicious dessert is not to be trusted. Ever.<br /><br />I've been dancing with SBD ever since -- whenever I get it in my head that I need to drop weight fast, I head right for the SBD.<br /><br />Last week I was in Nashville for a client conference, so the week involved a lot of meals out, desserts, lemon drop martinis, etc. I came home and knew I needed to get back to my better-eating ways so decided to do SBD for a bit to "get back on track." Today's lunch? Spinach salad with carrots, tomatoes, and shrimp. I decided that I didn't need salad dressing -- oh no, just a spritz of lemon for me!<br /><br />Yeah, it was bad. And served as a reminder that I am not going to lose weight for the long haul if I keep making myself eat stuff that I can't tolerate for an afternoon, much less forever. This might be the fastest attempt at SBD in my history. Sure, it seems like some dressing could have solved the problem, but I think the biggest issue was convincing myself that this was going to be good enough to get me through the afternoon until dinner. It so was not.<br /><br />It did impart a good lesson though - sure, make your lunch (cheaper and better for you anyway), and include lots of veggies and good protein. But make it tasty, put some care into it. Add some carbs to lunch as long as they're not full of empty calories. I need to keep on my 30-Day cleanse, which was about making better choices, not dieting per se. I dropped almost 10 pounds that month, so why did I panic and go with SBD?<br /><br />Old habits die hard, I guess. Time to start rolling that rock up the hill again ...Freakin Happyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09294867207572600397noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8968751592703571062.post-22090249159238731462010-04-14T10:15:00.000-07:002010-04-14T10:17:06.660-07:00August 7Remember when I said I was taking the GMAT this year? I just made my appointment for August 7.<br /><br />It's on!<br /><br />(I will not freak out, I will not freak out, I will not freak out ...)Freakin Happyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09294867207572600397noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8968751592703571062.post-19108898708878335982010-04-13T06:13:00.000-07:002010-04-13T06:25:21.168-07:00Feel the (Fat)BurnIn my last entry I wrote that I missed running. I did, to a point; I guess more than anything, I missed *moving*. Being active, feeling good and not like an asthmatic 90-year-old.<br /><br />So I got back on the treadmill. And immediately hated running again. It's just my nature: miss something, get nostalgic, take it up again and realize I stopped for a reason. Kind of like that time I thought I could wear jelly shoes in high school when they came back in the mid 90s. Yeah, not so much.<br /><br />Anyway, my realization about hating running did not deter me from trying new things on the treadmill - mostly, the Fatburn program. In addition to the hopeful-sounding goal of the program, I'm enjoying the challenge of walking fast enough that I could run, but have to walk because my incline is at 6 or 7. I've even worked in a bit of jogging into the routine. Leg muscles I didn't know I had are sore after doing this program; overall this feels harder than jogging/running on a 1 incline, but I enjoy it so much more. Leave it to me to like something more difficult. That's also my nature.<br /><br />The lesson learned? Branch out; don't feel like you have to subscribe to an exercise or plan because everyone says that's the fastest way to reach your goal. For the longest time I pushed myself to run because I thought that's what I had to do to make progress. Turns out it's a lot more effective to do what I enjoy and I'm more likely to stick with it. Why has it taken all these years for me to realize this?? I'm a little stubborn sometimes.<br /><br />This realization has kick-started a movement for me in pursuing other goals as well - I'm more willing to look at alternatives to accomplish what I want rather than hold on to a notion of how I'm "supposed" to do things. It's quite freeing (and scary and kind of stressful, but I'll go with "freeing" for now).Freakin Happyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09294867207572600397noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8968751592703571062.post-44131763145157597302010-03-30T07:20:00.000-07:002010-03-30T09:57:42.366-07:00Inspiration in Aisle 5<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgBGpELYlsgKYXp3kTQn6QHzcbXwdCw5V17R0Vzj8elstFe1YLjHgVZdvn8ztdYlAZ2As9o9KQAq52cxe9MkZkJIss_cqjznqoFI8x2Uo9mPMxnfnXsGki5IpCeiz1vvd8ZJ2P78juK17I/s1600/Untitled-2.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 309px; height: 207px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgBGpELYlsgKYXp3kTQn6QHzcbXwdCw5V17R0Vzj8elstFe1YLjHgVZdvn8ztdYlAZ2As9o9KQAq52cxe9MkZkJIss_cqjznqoFI8x2Uo9mPMxnfnXsGki5IpCeiz1vvd8ZJ2P78juK17I/s320/Untitled-2.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5454434798043067426" /></a>I hit the grocery store this Sunday on my own and took way too long to get everything and was, for some reason, scattered as all get out. So when the cashier mentioned that the chicken breasts were buy one, get TWO free and I could get another package, I went for it (What? Chicken is expensive, yo.)<br /><br />I was a total dork and ran over to get the chicken and come back because the last thing I wanted to be was THAT person that holds up a line, then meanders all over the place before coming back, earning death glares in the process. No one was behind me at the time but I ran anyway. And as I ran, I realized something pretty shocking: I missed running.<br /><br />Me. Missed running. This is huge. And so not what I expected to pick up at Harris Teeter that morning.<br /><br />So I'm getting back to it -- quite delayed, as I have the "fun" known as Little Gym tonight so I'll be back to it tomorrow night. Why not Sunday night or yesterday, you ask? Or the last two months? Because I was busy and had stuff to do, of course.<br /><br />But yes, tomorrow. Back on the treadmill FINALLY. Not signing up for a race anytime soon because have I mentioned that <a href="http://freakinhappy.blogspot.com/2009/11/i-will-be-so-glad-when-this-is-done.html">I hate training</a>? But you never know, I might be willing to be talked into the <a href="http://www.marinecorpshistorichalf.com/Left_Nav/MCM_Event_Series_460/Turkey_Trot.htm">Turkey Trot 10K</a> come November.Freakin Happyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09294867207572600397noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8968751592703571062.post-16606026328175131982010-03-23T08:39:00.000-07:002010-03-23T08:57:01.037-07:00Green Thumb, Maybe? We'll See.<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://www.growquest.com/container%20gardening/32-635.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 270px; height: 338px;" src="http://www.growquest.com/container%20gardening/32-635.jpg" border="0" alt="" /></a><br />So I am not usually a get-out-there-and-get-sweaty girl. I'm more of a sit-in-the-AC-and-watch-other-people-work kind of person. But for some reason, I have always been weirdly obsessed with yard work. Not that I've done a lot of it, mind you, but when I do it sets off some sort of synaptic misfire in which I truly believe I can march into Lowe's, buy a bunch of gardening supplies, and do something with them. Successfully.<br /><br />I think my interest goes back to being a kid and spending summers with my grandparents. My Pop Pop was an awesome gardener, y'all. He had a huge plot where he grew potatoes, cucumbers, squash, and ... tomatoes. OMG, the tomatoes. They were so good, and to pick one off of the vine and eat it in the warm sunny backyard was summer for me. When I think about my Pop Pop (he passed away in 2001) I always think about those tomatoes and his garden - and I think he would be thrilled that I thought about them. He loved working hard and having something to show for it (he was a carpenter. I like to think he and Jesus are having a grand old time up in Heaven).<br /><br />*Sniff* Anyway. Gardening.<br /><br />It all started this weekend when we cleaned up the front yard and I got the notion that if I was good at raking pine needles and leaves, surely I could plant some things and grow some of my own veggies and herbs, right? Then I would really be eating local, har har. Yeah, it was that bad.<br /><br />I'm Googling "container gardening" and considering what I want to plant. I can't really consider an in-the-ground garden right now because we have loads of deer and if I put in a ton of work into a garden just to have freeloading deer come and eat everything ... oh hell no, Bambis. Grow your own delicious local produce!<br /><br />(And yes, I know there are deer-preventing things you can do. I'll research them but right now I'm sacrificing logic for sarcasm. Shocking, I know.)<br /><br />So yeah, another plan in place - I've heard container gardening is relatively easy so hopefully I'll have something to show for my efforts. I can feel my thumb turning green already!Freakin Happyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09294867207572600397noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8968751592703571062.post-55498799093995149992010-03-15T09:46:00.000-07:002010-03-15T09:53:28.244-07:00Same Old, Same OldStill working away on this cleanse thing. Lost another pound last week for a total of 8.5 in three weeks. Not bad for my slow-losing self! 31.5 pounds to go ...<br /><br />Can we talk for a quick minute about The Biggest Loser this season? I was so inspired last season by Shay and Abby and their respective stories, and this season ... meh. It's still incredible to see everyone shed the weight so quickly, but I'm not super into it this season. Methinks they're just airing seasons too close together. Then I caught a TLC special on season 3's winner Eric, the one who gained most of his weight back and is now trying to lose it again. I would have felt sorry for his gains if I wasn't more concerned about his narcissistic need to be on TV all the time. Guy's got bigger problems than an addiction to fast food.<br /><br />Otherwise, it's just the same old routine for us as we head into Spring, although this is the busy season. My head is already spinning with all of the projects I need to complete by end of Q2 and the Q hasn't even started yet! The husband is also frantic as he hurries to complete the school yearbook by the end of the month. Right as he gets to breathe a sigh of relief, I start traveling in April and May. Good times!<br /><br />But yes, it's the same old routine ... I really need to think of how to make our busy lives a little more fun/interesting as it warms up outside. We can't save *all* of the fun for summer. Perhaps an Awesome Spring Plan? If I have time, that is.Freakin Happyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09294867207572600397noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8968751592703571062.post-36438861034412581802010-03-09T10:22:00.000-08:002010-03-09T10:29:45.430-08:00As the Cleanse Turns ...So the first two weeks of this cleanse thing have gone well! <br /><br />Although I have had white carbs. And Swedish Fish. And cake. Just not all the time.<br /><br />And I'm down 7.5 pounds in two weeks so I can't be screwing up too badly ... yet. But, and this is what is bugging me, I haven't really started getting active again. I really need to get me arse on my treadmill. I finally seem to be coming out of my winter funk (thank goodness warmer weather is here), now I just need to DO IT.<br /><br />One thing I have done, bittersweetly, is cancel my Weight Watchers online account. It was great for helping me lose my pregnancy weight and then some, but I've stalled so much and I haven't been using it and by now, I know what portions to eat. I know when I've eaten too much. It's not about awareness for me anymore; it's about something emotional for me that an online tracker just can't address. I did have good progress with it though and do recommend it for those who need a good place to start for their weight loss.<br /><br />I've also taken some other steps to help with some other things that have been holding me back ... not sure whether I want to open up about that yet or not. I feel like it's too early right now.<br /><br />But yes, good progress so far! Let's see ... about 8 months until the bridesmaid dress.32.5 pounds to go.Freakin Happyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09294867207572600397noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8968751592703571062.post-12000328781414409912010-02-24T07:35:00.000-08:002010-02-24T07:42:15.314-08:00Planny Plannerson.Yep, time for more plans.<br /><br />This time Tom and I are embarking on a 30 Day Cleanse to get ourselves out of the cookies and ice cream rut that took over when it snowed like a mofo earlier this month. It's not super-drastic, just trying to cut out white flour and sugar, eat whole grains when we do eat carbs, and just generally eat better. Hopefully we'll be so thrilled it will turn into a lifetime of awesome eating habits. Maybe.<br /><br />So no more Singapore Mei Fun for me for a while. I will miss you, flaming-yellow fire noodles of my dreams.<br /><br />I was trying to make the start of the cleanse coincide with my re-commitment to my treadmill and the 30-Day Shred, but that's been a no-go thanks to a pulled groin. I can't even say I pulled it doing something fun, unless trying to outrun a speeding truck while crossing the street is considered fun. Alas. However, I'm feeling better and hope to be back to it tomorrow. Follow along as I huff and puff my way to some kind of fitness!<br /><br />As usual, my timing couldn't be more perfect: this weekend we're attending a wedding where the bride and groom are total gourmets and I'm sure the food and beverages will be fabulous. Hmmm. Everyone needs a day off, right?Freakin Happyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09294867207572600397noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8968751592703571062.post-61552057341272096732010-02-16T06:42:00.000-08:002010-02-16T06:44:40.336-08:00I'm Sick. Again. I'm Lazy. Continually.I have been fighting a cold for almost a month now. I am over it.<br /><br />Also, I've been a lazy, over-indulgent slug and have been getting poofy and lazy.<br /><br />Spring, please get here soon or these 40 pounds are never going to come off.<br /><br />Love,<br /><br />MeFreakin Happyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09294867207572600397noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8968751592703571062.post-91177399476932720592010-02-05T08:20:00.000-08:002010-02-05T08:26:47.358-08:00So Yeah ... I've Been Away for a WhileNot even on purpose ... January just took over my life and it seems like 2010 is going to be just as crazy and hectic as last year, if this past month has been any indication.<br /><br />I need to get back to using this blog to make myself honest - I haven't hit the treadmill in a while and I like being all dorky with my various plans and projects. I'll get back to it soon.<br /><br />Especially since I'm close to ordering my bridesmaid dress for November and have to find some magical way to drop 40 pounds by November 6 ... plus I need to drop that chunk of weight anyway. It's about time.<br /><br />Think I can look foxy in this? This chick seems to be feeling her oats:<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://www.saisonblanche.com/saison/images/2137_b_1.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 300px; height: 389px;" src="http://www.saisonblanche.com/saison/images/2137_b_1.jpg" border="0" alt="" /></a>Freakin Happyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09294867207572600397noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8968751592703571062.post-48955895245066587382010-01-06T08:46:00.000-08:002010-01-06T08:55:53.423-08:00New Year, New Me?So the holidays were good -- it felt like a sprint to the finish, but good overall. Lots of family time, good food, and hanging out. Having a wondrous two and a half year old who fully believes in Santa and fRosty the Snowman greatly imporved my enjoyment of the season.<br /><br />So now, the NEW YEAR. A time for resolutions. Maybe a vow that with a new year will come a new me?<br /><br />Nah, not really. I like a lot of parts of who I am already. But that doesn't mean I'm not up for change and improvement!<br /><br />I am making a commitment to continue making fitness and eating well a major part of my life. I have also learned enough about myself over the last year to know that while I do enjoy my treadmill, races are not for me. So I'm not going to do them. I am bringing strength training though, via my <a href="http://www.jillianmichaels.com/">favorite yelling Biggest Loser trainer</a>. I'm just doing her 30 Day Shred DVD and some other workouts. Hopefully this will help round out the jogging so the flab can go bye bye. Please, let it go bye bye.<br /><br />I'm also going to try and perfect a combination of being realistic, compassionate, semi-dead-inside (for business purposes) and snarky. Lately I have been sacrificing one or two of those traits and indulging in the other. I like that I'm all of these things, but when they come out of balance, a lot of my life suffers because of it. <br /><br />It will take care in both my personal thoughts and actions, but I think I can do it. It's all about growing. Personally, not ass-wise, that is.Freakin Happyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09294867207572600397noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8968751592703571062.post-27929086755341732322009-12-14T09:39:00.000-08:002009-12-14T10:14:41.011-08:00Yeah ... Christmas is Going to be Better this Year.<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2618/4179536521_212e7ca3eb_m.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 161px; height: 240px;" src="http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2618/4179536521_212e7ca3eb_m.jpg" border="0" alt="" /></a><br />So last Christmas ... no I did not <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xRIqV1cTsIY&feature=player_embedded">give you my heart, but the very next day, you gave it away</a>.<br /><br />No, last Christmas, I was covered in hives.<br /><br />I had some allergic reaction to <span style="font-style:italic;">something</span>, I think it was green peppers but it was never confirmed, and a week before Christmas I was covered head to toe in crazy red itchy hives. I looked like a science experiment. Needless to say, prepping for the holidays was next to impossible while trying to fight my way out of the Benadryl coma I was in. Although when I had to take steroids to help with the reaction, I got A LOT done.<br /><br />So Christmas last year was weird; I wasn't into it, I felt awful, and the whole thing just felt like it was something I needed to get through.<br /><br />THIS Christmas, I am feeling <a href="http://www.amazon.com/How-Grinch-Stole-Christmas-Seuss/dp/0394800796/ref=sr_1_7?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1260812615&sr=8-7">merry. Very</a>!<br /><br />Decorations are up. Tree is decorated. Gifts purchased. Menu chosen. Carols sung on a daily basis, thanks to a toddler who loves them. His excitement has been positively contagious. I am even making cookies with my little guy on Christmas Eve, despite the high odds that we will both end up covered in flour.<br /><br />Hey, it's better than hives.<br /><br />And I'm really looking forward to Christmas Eve night with the hubs. Christmas Eve has always been a more quiet, cozy time than the rest of the holiday. It's the soft quiet before the frenzy; a chance to sit together, talk, and think of Christmases past -- living in crappy apartments, or being apart at our respective families' houses because we weren't married yet -- and be really thankful for how far we've come and the family we've built together.<br /><br />I don't take many opportunities to slow down and think of what I have -- I'm usually too busy looking to accomplish what I haven't -- so it's always nice to take a moment, reminisce, and be grateful.Freakin Happyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09294867207572600397noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8968751592703571062.post-37955521303044092732009-12-08T05:58:00.000-08:002009-12-08T06:05:46.383-08:00It's Beginning to Look a lot Like Christmas ...<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgEdvr6CbW3ornZ91vBpU2eTyHn2O0HM_X4HVRjYMe75TWmbSzEO6X6FDIrZdsqBQ18tmry5XBDmFxm_xKhsucpov5OiBHtroa8qCmK7emNuDSyMowbWYtQ5fZZSA2bDmw5fhqgTmbgfO4/s1600-h/4161705344_08300b3075_b.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 214px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgEdvr6CbW3ornZ91vBpU2eTyHn2O0HM_X4HVRjYMe75TWmbSzEO6X6FDIrZdsqBQ18tmry5XBDmFxm_xKhsucpov5OiBHtroa8qCmK7emNuDSyMowbWYtQ5fZZSA2bDmw5fhqgTmbgfO4/s320/4161705344_08300b3075_b.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5412866009676826930" /></a><br />... Because I am stressin'. Nothing new or different from what anyone else is probably feeling this time of year, but oy. Between trying to finish up projects at work and trying to find the right gifts while not bankrupting myself, it's been kind of hectic around here.<br /><br />BUT. I am almost done. With more than 2 weeks to spare! I need to hit the mall (ugh) and the local outdoor shopping center (blargh) but then I'm done with gifts. The tree and decorations are already up, and the holiday cards are in. Now to just actually address them and get them in the mail ...<br /><br />I'm really digging this holiday season so far. It helps to have an enthusiastic toddler who wakes up every morning as enamored (or more so) of the Christmas tree as he was the previous day. And when he says, "I'm happy and excited for Christmas, Mommy!," well my heart grows three sizes.<br /><br />It also snowed this past weekend, probably the earliest we've had snow since moving here 5 years ago. It was fun to watch B's reaction to it, and it definitely helped with the holiday spirit.<br /><br />I'll post more thoughts later on the holidays, including one of my favorite times, Christmas Eve.Freakin Happyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09294867207572600397noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8968751592703571062.post-82303940334051008592009-11-30T13:08:00.000-08:002009-11-30T13:20:53.898-08:00Thankful.This is so late, with Thanksgiving come and gone, but I still want to list some of the many things I am thankful for. Even the things that make me cranky.<br /><br />In no certain order, I'm thankful for things big and small:<br /><br />My family, even though they drive me crazy. Including my patient and loving husband and my completely impatient but adorable and charming toddler.<br /><br />Facebook. I can't abide Twitter and email is fine, but Facebook is my hub of choice because I can be as active or passive as I want and everyone I know is in one place. Now if it would just stop with the crazy slowdowns and bugs and whatnot.<br /><br />My body. As big as it is right now, it is getting smaller and healthier. It allowed me to complete a 5K this fall, and with (hopefully) a more dedicated training program, will allow me to complete an 8K in April and a 10K next November. My body allows me to do some really cool things when I get out of my own way.<br /><br />Reality TV. If I'm ever feeling down, I can watch Biggest Loser or my personal favorite, Tough Love, to become inspired or grateful that I am not dating anymore. Yeesh.<br /><br />Also, decent scripted shows. Thank you Mad Men, Glee, Lost, 30 Rock, and Modern Family for providing entertainment that doesn't make me roll my eyes or want to throw things. Also, thank you Yo Gabba Gabba and Thomas the tank Engine for entertaining B, so he won't want to throw things.<br /><br />My job, for many reasons. I'm thankful to have a job at all, but I'm especially thankful or the flexibility and (until recently) unknown appreciation from my company's execs. I'm thankful that I'll get a chance to create my own path; I'm excited to see where it goes.<br /><br />Uncle Ben's Ready Rice. I seriously love the convenience of this stuff. They even have Basmati and Jasmine varieties! What's not to love?<br /><br />My iPod. I've completely given up CDs and just buy what I want from iTunes. It suits my non-commitment music personality.<br /><br />Coupons. Oh coupons, in this recession where would I be without you?<br /><br />The coming year. It's another year to live my life, make plans, and see what I can accomplish. It's also hopefully another year to mellow out my Type A tendencies (yeah right) and become a little wiser.Freakin Happyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09294867207572600397noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8968751592703571062.post-43617769848668780902009-11-23T06:32:00.000-08:002009-11-23T06:38:52.058-08:0048:22; 536 out of 587Yep - that's my time and my finishing place in the 5K this weekend.<br /><br />I wish I had done better, but you know it's all about the journey, blah blah. I am proud of myself for training for something and doing it; I just wish I could have really hit the inspirational mark of doing better than I thought, or really kicking ass, or something. I suppose getting off my dead ass and doing something at all is pretty kick ass, though.<br /><br />Also, and here's where the excuses start!, I was battling a pretty hefty allergy attack. I sounded like I smoked 3 packs a day and I couldn't breathe through my nose. So I suppose, for an overweight snotty mouth-breather, I did pretty well.<br /><br />The coolest thing for me though was the feeling afterward: No, not the immediate feeling of wanted to throw up/pass out because I started my kick too early and the finish line was farther away than I estimated. Once I sat down and had some water, I felt ... good. Really good. Not dead, not exhausted. I felt good, like someone who's working toward being healthier who accomplished a goal. So I guess, despite my tortoise-like time, it was a big victory for me.<br /><br />And now I'm plotting. The Charlottesville Marathon/Half Marathon/8K is coming up in April. I'm aiming low for the 8K, but who knows ... maybe a half is in my future? I'm getting back on my treadmill tonight; we'll see where it takes me next.Freakin Happyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09294867207572600397noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8968751592703571062.post-49161898792566928172009-11-20T08:36:00.000-08:002009-11-20T08:39:46.713-08:00Get Ready!Tomorrow's the big race day! I'm actually feeling pretty good about it, hoping to just have fun and get through it.<br /><br />I'm currently battling an allergy attack that has left me with a crazy throat situation and no voice, so that should be interesting. My practice jog went OK yesterday so hopefully tomorrow will be fine.<br /><br />So ... catch ya on the flip side when I will be DONE with this 5K! And then I'll probably write some sort of philosophical/sappy entry afterward about my training journey. I know you're excited.Freakin Happyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09294867207572600397noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8968751592703571062.post-51670408356628435102009-11-12T05:53:00.000-08:002009-11-12T05:54:24.113-08:00Still Around ...Still jogging, still hanging with family, still watching The Biggest Loser, still trying to watch my weight, still trying to figure out what the hell is up with my job.<br /><br />Just feeling quite a bit down lately and not sure what to do about it yet. I'm pondering.Freakin Happyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09294867207572600397noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8968751592703571062.post-30062358101639179282009-11-03T08:15:00.000-08:002009-11-03T08:20:53.665-08:00I Will Be So Glad When This is Done!And by "this" I mean, of course, this #!%&@ 5K. I am over training for it, I am over panicking about looking stupid while running it, I am. over. it.<br /><br />You know I'm over it when I'm doing that writer crutch thing of putting a period after every word for emphasis.<br /><br />But, to my credit (have to give yourself a little credit every once in a while), I'm doing fine with training. It's just sucky because I'm putting pressure on myself even when I try not to. I don't know ... I'm weird, OK?<br /><br />Other than prepping for the 5K we're putting together packing lists and whatnot for our grand road trip up to Long Island to see the in-laws, attend a wedding, and celebrate my SIL's engagement. This trip is bringing on a whole other level of stress, but I am trying to focus on the good and visualize a smooth trip. If I envision it, it will happen, right?<br /><br />I'm also debating whether to blog about something kind of judgy but irritating, but wondering if I should since peeps who read this blog will know exactly what I'm bitching about ... hmmm ...<br /><br />Oh, and it's Tuesday. Looking forward to watching Fat People Crying while noshing on low-fat pumpkin bread. It's my night off from jogging.Freakin Happyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09294867207572600397noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8968751592703571062.post-84892659834867283362009-10-27T05:46:00.000-07:002009-10-27T05:54:42.778-07:00Work it Out, Work it Out.So I jogged last night and it was fine. I was a little slower than usual, but not too far off of my usual pace of ... 13 minutes per mile.<br /><br />Ha! Yes, you read right. I think the tortoise, the hare, and the entire fable-tastic forest would beat my ass in a race. But whatever, I'm doing it and I will be done in under an hour, which is all that the race people require. Done.<br /><br />I'm jogging again tonight so that I can squeeze in three jogs for this week. We have <a href="http://www.thelittlegym.com/Pages/default.aspx">Little Gym</a> tomorrow night and you know, I just CAN'T miss that. Because nothing caps off a long workday like 20 simultaneous toddler meltdowns over who gets to do a forward roll on the cheese mat first.<br /><br />So, yes. Three jogs this week and well on my way to hopefully not embarrassing myself on November 21.<br /><br />Tonight when The Biggest Loser theme song asks me <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jbkysd9mQho">what have I done today to make me feel proud</a>, I'll know. Aw yeah.Freakin Happyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09294867207572600397noreply@blogger.com0