Feel the (Fat)Burn

In my last entry I wrote that I missed running. I did, to a point; I guess more than anything, I missed *moving*. Being active, feeling good and not like an asthmatic 90-year-old.

So I got back on the treadmill. And immediately hated running again. It's just my nature: miss something, get nostalgic, take it up again and realize I stopped for a reason. Kind of like that time I thought I could wear jelly shoes in high school when they came back in the mid 90s. Yeah, not so much.

Anyway, my realization about hating running did not deter me from trying new things on the treadmill - mostly, the Fatburn program. In addition to the hopeful-sounding goal of the program, I'm enjoying the challenge of walking fast enough that I could run, but have to walk because my incline is at 6 or 7. I've even worked in a bit of jogging into the routine. Leg muscles I didn't know I had are sore after doing this program; overall this feels harder than jogging/running on a 1 incline, but I enjoy it so much more. Leave it to me to like something more difficult. That's also my nature.

The lesson learned? Branch out; don't feel like you have to subscribe to an exercise or plan because everyone says that's the fastest way to reach your goal. For the longest time I pushed myself to run because I thought that's what I had to do to make progress. Turns out it's a lot more effective to do what I enjoy and I'm more likely to stick with it. Why has it taken all these years for me to realize this?? I'm a little stubborn sometimes.

This realization has kick-started a movement for me in pursuing other goals as well - I'm more willing to look at alternatives to accomplish what I want rather than hold on to a notion of how I'm "supposed" to do things. It's quite freeing (and scary and kind of stressful, but I'll go with "freeing" for now).

Breakthrough.

After my last post, I had a breakthrough on Saturday. I was doing my usual jog routine, getting that nervous tightening in my chest as the warm-up concluded and it was time to jog, when I decided to change my thinking.

Normally, I am a panicky worker-outer (yes, that's a word. For my purposes). No matter how comfortable I am with a particular workout, I always panic before I get into the heart of a workout. Maybe it's fear of failure? Or fear of an asthma attack, which I had often when I was younger? Whatever the reason, the panic always remains. Especially with jogging/running.

So I decided that this time, there would be no fear. Just jog; who cares if I'm slow, or look goofy, or have to take a quick walk break? I'm in a room by myself in my own house--who cares?

So I did. I ditched my interval routine and tried to jog as long as I could before needing to walk--and it worked! I went for longer, I was calm, and I felt really great after working out. After being stuck on a certain week of my plan for almost three weeks (yeesh), I feel ready to move on.

Not to be too cliche, but it got me thinking: Where else in my life do I let panic or fear hold me back? And how can I fix that?

Hit the Books

After whining my way through my last entry about gaining balance, I decided I need to pull an Oprah-style makeover of my daily life. If only I had Nate and Peter and the other experts to just come over and do it all for me ...

In the past, the first step of any makeover would have been weight loss; this time, I'm taking a new direction. I'm going to get back to reading. When I traveled a lot in my former job, I was a reading fiend and blew through stacks of books. My latest travel schedule inspired me to get back to it, and hopefully continue when my travel slows a bit.

I mentioned before that I read God Save the Fan and Eat, Pray, Love. I also recently finished When You Are Engulfed in Flames by David Sedaris, Company by Max Barry and Love is a Mix Tape by Rob Sheffield.

I enjoyed them all, and now you can see how seriously behind I am in my reading stack: the Sheffield book is two years old. At least the Sedaris is new.

It feels good, as a former English major, to be reading again. Reading is absolutely helping my writing -- I write A LOT for my job and things finally seem to be falling into place after a bout of writer's block. It's probably no coincidence that I started this blog when I started reading again.

So yay, reading. Especially now that I'm reading something more challenging than Sandra Boynton board books. Although I do like the twist ending of But Not the Hippopotamus.